Hilarious Jokes in English

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Difference between talent and God gift:
A man can give lecture for 2 hours on many subjects. This is talent
A woman can give lecture for 2 hour without any subject - this is a God gift!

Hilarious Jokes in English:

What two things can never be eaten for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner

Hilarious Jokes in English:

What is so special about Pretty Bunny’s jewellery?
It is made from 14 carrot (carrat) gold

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Where can you always find a tiger’s head?
Four feet from its tail.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

What's brown and runny?
Usain Bolt.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

How do you make one disappear?
Add a ‘g’ or an ‘n’ to ‘one’!

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Very Funny:

if a girl says - I don't like shopping...than marry her!

After making girlfriends, guys actually know how costly the life style is.

Hilarious Jokes in English

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Wife: What is the spelling of Happiness
Husband: U.N.M.A.R.R.I.E.D.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Some kids are so cute that after seeing them - we desire to meet their moms..

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Beggar Gets 10 cents from madam on red light.
Her shouts: this is not fair..
Madam: Why?
Beggar: One last red light, you donated USD 10..
Madam: How did you know?
Beggar: While showing his apple phone, see he shouted in group on whatsapp!

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Kid: My teacher is cute and beautiful.
Dad: Son, teacher is like mother.
Kid: Selfish, you always think o yourself.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Responsive:

How do you get a one-armed stoner out of a tree?
A wave.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Something a bridegroom might wear: 'A dress..'

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Dr: When did you first notice you had diarrhea?
Patient: When I took off my bicycle clips.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Something that Father Christmas does when he comes to your house: 'Feeds your pets..'

Hilarious Jokes in English:

My girlfriend told me choose any one - "friends or me". Sometimes I miss her.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

*Stalks crush on Facebook*... *Accidentally likes status from 2009*... *Deletes Facebook*... *Sets computer on fire*... *Leaves country*

Hilarious Jokes in English:

What do a mole and an eagle have in common?
They both live underground, apart from the eagle.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Cute:

Girl's logic: When you like a guy, do nothing about it and expect him to magically know and make the first move.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

You breathe oxygen? We have so much in common.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Something that makes you close your eyes: "Dark.."

What's the difference between driving in golf and driving a car?
When you drive a car you don't want to hit anything.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Wife : Do you want meal?
Husband: What are my choices?
Wife: Denial or acceptance.

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Evergreen:

The pig who fell in the DIRTY MUD took a CLEAN bath

Hilarious Jokes in English:

The robber who was robbing was caught by a GOOD policeman

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Very Neat

Child : With report card in hand..

Mother: So what’s your final grade?

Child : Underwater

Mother : what does that mean?

Child: Below C LEVEL (Sea.. you know..)

Hilarious Jokes in English:

When are the steps rude????
When they stare at you!

Hilarious Jokes in English:

Kid : (returning from his match in his floor) "Mom", can I have an apple?
Mom: Baby, you just ate one.
Kid: An apple a day keeps the doctor away and I just broke his window.

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